Sherlock: (sighs heavily)

Alfredo: You’re firing me so you can be my friend?
Sherlock: Yeah.

Alfredo: Explain.
Sherlock: It’s a newspaper; there’s news in it.

Sherlock: That’s idiot for “yes.”

Winston: Can somebody please tell me what the hell is going on in here?

Jess: Fan…tastic.
Nick: Took a long time to say that word.

Jess: Capital “O,” capital “K” capital “A,” capital “Y.” I’m okay.

Jess: Are we still allowed to see each other naked?
Nick: Yes.
Jess: Do you think so?
Nick: I don’t know.
Jess: Hmm.
Nick: Maybe.
Jess: Ah…
Nick: Definitely not.
Jess: Derfi-niddley nit. Boob season’s over, for you.

Caroline: While you were doing the cake, I was doing our taxes. And we owe Uncle Sam $1,500.
Max: Man, why does every uncle I know try to screw me?